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themoonphase:

I think the biggest turn on is knowing you turned someone else on.

I’m a mess and It all comes down to loving you. I’m a mess and I’m kind of losing it in here. You may think of me mad, I know. I’m through with it all; I care about no one but you. I think of no one but you. Sense of self all gone; who am I kidding? Sense of self’s been gone since the very first moment I ever felt that you chose me. I felt that you did. And ever since I’ve been fucking myself in the head with unfulfilled notions which belonged strictly in my mind. And you are right, I mean, most of it is self-created, unrequited…call it however you wish to call it. The truth is: I’ve been collapsing inside myself and yet I never feel empty enough. I never feel empty just enough to even dare quit being in love with you and loving you all at the same time because I’m constantly, constantly filled with you and no matter what happens I’m perpetually being reminded of the fact that you’ve been, in every way, my person. I never thought you’d let me in so much, I never thought I’d come to feel that you were genuinely interested enough in who I am to let me glimpse inside the world of you at all. I’m scared, I’m scared, I’m scared…not of losing you but of all of it remaining insufficient and tremendously vague in some sense; I’m scared and yet feel so fucking confident in all this sense of fear. You make me feel, you, you alone. I’m scared and you make me feel and fuck it I feel like I’ve been overusing words so much to the point of causing them to slightly lose their original meaning but really, I don’t care one bit, I love you with each breath. I love you everywhere, all the time and I’m scared. I don’t think you’re ever going to understand but I’m not interested in you figuring it completely out anyway. You once told me I was the strangest person you had met; I’d give the world to know whether you still think that’s the case. Because to me, I’m nothing but a transparent, dramatic, uncompromising in all my sensitivity, selfish and needy piece of nothing. I am nothing. You’ve become everything. Oh, I forgot. You already were.

All These Things You Wish You’d Say (via violentwavesofemotion)